35 Weeks

I had a mini-heart attack today when I opened the Babycenter app and it told me "35 days until your due date." When/How did this even happen?!? It's been a crazy couple of weeks. 

Kurt's parents were supposed to come visit us this coming Thursday for our spring break and then travel to Vietnam, returning back to China for Rosalie's birth. But unfortunately, his dad got really sick and it turns out they won't be able to make it. We are so disappointed but feel so grateful that they weren't here when it happened and that his dad can recover fully before a summer of fun! So we've rearranged a few things over here and my mom, step dad, and sister will be headed our way in April to stay with us for two weeks. We'll see if this little lady waits for them to arrive before she makes an appearance. 

Everything is starting to sink in. I've been trying to find apartments that would be suitable for us to stay when we deliver in Hong Kong among many other logistics. I know it will all work out in the end, it always does...but things like this make the planner inside me just cringe. I like to know everything in advance and the thought of having no clue when I'll go into labor, worrying about crossing borders, finding someone to stay with Sawyer, and figuring out a place to stay after we get out of the hospital is a lot to digest. 

I've been very adamant about trying for a VBAC this time around, but I'm definitely starting to have doubts. I think the fear of the unknown plays a big part and also I'm scared of being in labor and ending up with an emergency C-section regardless. I'm going to check this Saturday with my doctor to see her recommendation (how my scar looks, etc.) to see how "favorable" a VBAC would be for me. In the end, all that matters is that Rosalie gets here safely and I just need to keep telling myself that. I know I won't be able to predict the future either way (where's a crystal ball when you need it?!). I'll have to make a decision that I feel most comfortable with after consulting more with my doctor and talking it over with Kurt. 

I just had to share the picture below because Sawyer photobombed me #truelifewithatoddler 

We told Sawyer to say "Cheese!" and this is the face he made.

Gender: Girl 

Weight gain:  Not sure, haven't been to the doctor in a longgg time. We go this Saturday, so we'll see what the damage is then ;) 

Maternity clothes: Yep, or flowy tops (like above). I think it's almost time to bust out the maxis because the weather is starting to warm up here.

Stretch marks: nope

Belly button in or out: Outtie

Sleep: Still hit or miss. A few nights in a row I was up until 3:30 AM. I fall asleep around 9:00 but then wake up around 12:00 and have a realllly hard time falling back to sleep. 

Best moment this week: Not pregnancy related, but Sawyer told me he loved me for the first time. Yesterday while he was eating dinner, I said, "Sawyer, I love you!" and he responded, "I wuv yoouuu!" (I died. My heart literally bursted. It was the sweetest thing ever.)

Worst moment this week:  Hmmm maybe when Sawyer head butted me so hard that my nose made a cracking sound (true story)... it still hurts! Or just feeling like an old lady in general, my body is falling apart.

Miss anything: Sleeping through the night without this crazy insomnia, being able to see my feet, and fitting into my regular clothes.

Movement: Not quite as busy, her movements have slowed down. I think she's running out of space.

Cravings: Cookies, chocolate, fruit

Queasy or sick: Feeling fine 

Looking forward to: My maternity leave to begin and this little lady to get here! I have about 28392832 things to do on my to-do list until then, yikes.

Less Really is More

I don't know if it's the nesting that's kicked in full force, my hormones, an epiphany, or all of the above but I have been trying to make a positive shift in our life as far as keeping things "simple." 

It all started over our Chinese New Year holiday. I began the task of taking all of the tags off Rosalie's clothes to wash them and went through Sawyer's old baby things. Suddenly, it all just seemed so overwhelming. I went to look for something and it was hidden in piles of other boxes full of stuff that I kept or saved for some reason or another. 

I'd like to think of myself somewhere in the middle to low end on a spectrum of being considered a "hoarder." I usually don't get too attached to stuff. Sometimes it's necessary to stockpile particular items living abroad because if we run out of something like deodorant, we can't just run to Target and pick up a new one (they don't sell it here). My family always gave me a hard time when I was younger, because I was known to throw things out in order to clean the house (whoops). 

When we moved to China, we came with only four suitcases. After living here for four years, I always thought, "We really don't have much stuff." But, it's amazing how quickly "stuff" accumulates and begins to take over your life. So over the holiday, I decided to declutter and purge anything that I didn't love. I read a quote somewhere, "Would you pay to replace it if it was lost in a fire?" This was my mantra. I was ruthless. I really started to think about:  What is the purpose of this? Why do I have things that just sit on a shelf? Am I keeping this because I got as a gift and feel guilty? I downsized my closet to about 1/4 of what it was. I worked the entire break, non-stop. It wasn't about getting rid of stuff for the sake of getting rid of stuff. I really felt like it was about keeping and treasuring the things we do love.

After the break, I felt so much...lighter, relaxed, and free. As a family, we are trying to keep things simple. Here are a few examples of how we're trying to embrace a more simplistic approach to our life:

• Not overcommitting to things (learning to say no more without feeling guilty)
• More quality family time
• Let Sawyer explore and discover the world on his own (without us there to entertain him or show him how to do something the "right" way)
• Letting Sawyer be bored (without 3894384 toys to "distract" him so he can learn to be creative and a problem solver with the things he does have)
• Slow down, be more present, and live in the moment 
• Doing more of what we love (for me that's reading, decorating, planning, baking, spending time with my family and close friends, going on walks)
• Being very mindful of what we do purchase and put into our home (i.e. not buying something just because it's on sale)
• Paring down on beauty products and using as many natural products as possible

Below are quotes and books that have really inspired me incase you're interested :) 

"Minimalist Parenting is not an exercise in deprivation. You can still enjoy shopping, decorating, and aesthetics. The trick is to focus on the worth. If you use it or you love it, it's worth making space for it in your life."

-Minimalist Parenting